Can't Shake the feeling

I used to get really lonely, even in a crowd of people. I blamed it on not having anyone to call my own, figured it was that natural god-created yearning for a mate, and I figured it would pass when I had someone.

It didn't.

I feel really lonely again, and tonight sitting alone in my apartment watching TV, the feeling is pretty darned strong. Not strong enough to regret the decision to live alone, just strong.

I just spent the day watching CNBC and I'm in a panic once again that my spending is out of control. This *might* have something to do with a classmate of mine just buying a Car and a house and my not being even close to that right now. Yes, all fingers are not equal etc etc, but I should have saved enough by now that I have a down-payment together. I'm also more than a little ashamed of the fact that my savings today are at the exact same place they were this time last year.

I wish I could tell you where the money went. Okay, I did buy furniture. But that only accounts for about $2,000. Okay maybe $3,000. STILL, God help me. I will do better in 2010.

And omo, no tax refund last year mayne. So my naija ticket money this year had to come from savings. I am soooo going to a tax accountant next year. This rape and pillaging cannot continue. I'm about to become a republican. Kai!

I also need to diversify my savings. It used to be cute to put all my money in a Money Market account that many of the banks are offering when interest rates were 5%. Now, I'm earning about 1.3% on my money, while the stock market is happily rebounding without me! What nonsense! Was doing some reading on Roth IRAs and I just realized that there is no penalty for withdrawing contributions early! I need to up my percent investment, and also open an investment account.

I need more ideas about how to make my money work for me (especially since I think I'm going to go back to school in 2011).

Honestly

I don't have much to say other than John Mayer still has the ability to speak to me. Planning to get tickets this week for his show next February. Yes. It's that serious.

I can't sit here and lie that I'm against the death penalty. People like Fritzl should die. People like Charles Manson should die (yeah, I said it. You don't have to personally commit the crime to go to hell for it).

Must be nice to have friends who totally blow your mind. This is not saying that my friends are not awesome. Just read a couple tear-inducing stories over the weekend.

Saw the Broadway musical "Fela!" over the weekend on a whim. Good stuff (especially for only $27). Was slightly annoyed by the lead's accent sha. He sounded East African. *smh*

You know you're getting old when TWO nights in a row, you and your girls plan to go out, and all end up passed out in baggy pajamas. I had fun sha. Dancing around my friends apartment in 3.5 inch heels to Like Play is a TRUE workout mayne. My thighs are still complaining.

I'm getting worried about this thanksgiving sha. Need to compile my guestlist, plan my menu and start shopping like yesterday!

In other news, I finally ordered my dining table! I probably overpaid for it, but abeg jo, life is short (and my dining room is empty).

I keep hearing about this Mint.com. I think I'm about to hop on that bandwagon. Let my retirement at 35 plan begin in earnest!

Hi.

Still here.

Finally got those FE books. 2009 is not yet over. Yes we can!

Growing up is hard to do. Ah ahn! it is well o.

I'm learning that in Corporate America, if you don't toot your own horn, you might as well not have done the work.

I'm also realizing I am not here to make friends. People who deserve to be bitch-slapped will be bitch-slapped. Word to your mother.

I don't think I'm getting promoted this cycle. Which actually doesn't bother me at all. What does bother me is that I worked very hard at being all things to all people, and the specifically acted like I didn't. I spent 6 month whoring my expertise and time, and I got a "Tori occasionally reaches out to the team to help". Six. Straight. Months. Of doing everything for everyone. And I get an "occasionally"? My feelings are officially hurt.

Living and learning.

Otherwise, my life is brilliant.