Wednesday, March 29, 2006
Why do I Still Care?
And I didnt really care.
I talked about him way more than I cared about seeing him, but my heart only skipped when I thought my buddy was gonna call him.
I came back and I havent thought about him at all...
...until an old friend asked me to send recent pictures of me and I bumped into pictures of him hiding in my pictures folder, taunting me, laughing at me, daring me to delete them...
and I was surprised I hadn't done that already.
Monday, March 20, 2006
Am I Crazy
Im just saying...
Thursday, March 16, 2006
Copasetic & Cool
Im having a beautiful day and it didn't even start yet. I dont know where the happiness starts each morning. It might be while I brush my teeth in front of the mirror in the morning after staring at myself for about 10 minutes. It might be somewhere in there while Im staring at myself. It might be in the shower. I dont even know what I think about in the shower. All I know is that by the time Im dressed and in the kitchen for breakfast, I'm happy and perky and ready to face the day.
Or maybe it's on the walk to work. My fingers are frozen, and my nose is drippy and Im bundled up like the Michelin man, but my iPod is doing its magic and life is beautiful, even with the dead skunk on the embankment.
Oh yeah, just in case you didnt know, the best "walk to work in the morning at the end of winter/beginning of spring is
- Hill St. Soul [thank you Soul! ]
- John Mayer Trio [Good love is on the way, Another Kind of Green]
- Plantashun Boiz [Emmema]
- Queen Latifah [California Dreamin']
- Ralph Tresvant
- Tosin Martins [Olo mi -- this one you can listen to all day and night]
Im sure I have about a million more, but I cant think of them right now. Im gonna sit still and put together an "On the Way to Work" playlist.
Its been so long since I made a playlist or mix-CD. I used to do it all the time in college to record a particular person or emition. I only have one of the CD's left because the others were fapped by various people.
I have no idea what is going on in the world. I need to start reading the news again. if gmail doesnt flash it across the top of my screen or its not an MSN headline, chances are I'll miss the article. I also plan to go join the Ann Arbor Library today. Ypsi library is too far away now, and the number of books im reading each week is exponentially declining. Not good, if I plan to take over the world within the next 20 years.
Today is my friday [I hope you all choke with envy].This weekend, I'm off to Virginia to be wined and dined by a prospective grad school.
I'm very grateful for good friends. Thank you Rae.
Wednesday, March 15, 2006
Superhero
*sigh*
Okay, I think its coming. But its gonna be random.
I have a special talent for pissing off my friends. Beside "foot-in-mouth-syndrome" in the encyclopedia is my picture with my foot rammed up to my knee.
Im lonesome. And I hate to admit it. I just dont think its proper to say you want Something to Sleep To. But I've shut up about it for so long that I let a little of it out and now it's all I can seem to talk about. I just know my friends want to shoot me or are systematically blocking me on IM. I promise I'll eventually shut up.
I already need a new blog. I already cant be totally honest on this one. Told too many people about it and Im back to square one.
Maybe its for the better. All that angst made for pretty sombre reading.
It's amazing how much poetry I find in music. I wonder if the writers put it in there on purpose or just stumbled on gold. Something to sleep to is a Michelle Branch line that i SWEAR perfectly encompasses how I feel about falling asleep to a gently rising and falling chest and gentle breathing and utter vulnerability and strength at the same time.
I think watching your child sleep makes motherhood completely worth it.
Brian McKnight could still get it. As long as I break his heart and he stands outside my window and sings "Get Over You".
More randomness later.
Monday, March 13, 2006
Monday, March 06, 2006
Candy is the Devil
Now Im gonna sit at work hungry for no reason because I broke my fast by mistake but I [obviously] didnt bring in lunch.
*smh*
Sunday, March 05, 2006
He is the Keeper of my Secrets
Say a prayer for my family. And ask him to bless my sister and my uncles more than they have ever been blessed and that his grace be sufficient for us.
You promised to supply all our needs according to your riches in glory and you have never let us down. I bless you because you are faithful.
I didnt go to church today. There is little more I want right now that to fall on my knees and bawl in a church filled with that kind of song that surrounds you and fills up your every pore.
You are so faithful.
I cant get away from that girl who sang in QC
Great is thy faithfulness, Great is thy faithfulness
Morning by morning new mercies I see
All I have needed thy hand hath provided
Great is thy faithfullness
Great is thy faithfulness
Great is thy faithfulness
Lord
Unto
me.
Wednesday, March 01, 2006
"Baby, I'm Pregnant..."
I swear, it's really going to be that easy. Each year it gets more and more pronounced. Im EXTRA gragged and in need of affection when Im ovulating.
I find myself blogging about wanting to just be kissed oh so gently sitting crunched up on the couch with the tv off but the lights all on. No words, no sounds just glossy lip gloss . Jeans and bare feet. My long long legs stretched out across yours. Just sitting, laughing, kissing.
I find myself wanting to call all the sorry losers I've ever known and say "I'm coming over".
I find myself listening to Ne-Yo and Justin Timberlake and Jason Mraz and John Mayer.
I find myself getting bold and proactively chasing. I find my solo evening which used to be so welcome filled with melancholy.
I swear, I'm not doing the long distance thing. I remember being in a relationship and having to schedule our moments. But that in effect means Im scheduling my next relationship for September 2006. Which is just as silly.
Im open. I'll be poor as hell, but I guess if I have to do it, I'll do it. Long waits at the airport and no new shoes, because Southwest Airlines is proud owner of my shoe fund.
*sigh*
LOL. Im not even sad. This blog is depressing. Im sitting at my desk grinning. I promise! I'm excited about the possibilities. I realised yesterday that I'm very almost 22. And it shocked me. lol. I'm getting older. And maybe not wiser, but just a teensy bit more mature. And it's exciting and scary at the same time. It's not scary, its sad. Im not a baby anymore, but the future holds no fear anymore. My life is going to be okay. I feel like bursting into song, [which I did on my way to work until my nose filled with the smell of dead skunk which killed the mood. But I digress.] I want to go shopping for hot new clothes and go to Chicago with the girls and feel as beautiful as I did the night of the accident. I want to wear open toe heels again [warm up dammit] and show off my pedicure.
Spring is in the Air. New life. New dreams. New Adventures. The possibilities are endless.